Nothing's better.

So in my last post i said when school starts everything will be better. it kind of has. but not really. i've only made three friends. but it's only been a week. the girls at my school are extremely uninteresting and set in the cliques to an extent that if you laugh at what they're saying, and you're not in their clique they'll look at you like you did something wrong. all my friends are the new kids. the clique girls are the classical prep type with a rich dad and straight hair, pinned back. there's like one original one amongst them all, but she's kind of rude. she asks me things like "Are those really butterflies?" or "Does your bracelet really say rape?" I mean how do you respond to that? "No, those are colorful puppies on my notebook, not butterflies." "Rape?! WHAT?! NO!" No. Of course i had to say yeah and she acted like she was higher than me by snickering to herself and then widening her eyes about the rape bracelet. All my old friends rarely talk to me. I hardly ever have to charge my phone, but i still do just to do it. so far Lily has forgetten about me. but that's all. so i guess it's not that bad. even though she was one of my best friends. I think i'll write more on The Nice Way to be Mean.I feel a little down. and that's when the most drama comes out of me :D

Well.

This blog was a fail. Polyvore got the best of me. So has facebook and myspace. and my stupid phone. i apologize blogger. i never started a summer plan. and i think that's why my summer went by so quickly. i plan things. a lot of things. i already know what i'm doing when i'm older. the college i'm going to. even the classes i'm taking next semester. and i love that. it's just getting there that i hate. i know kids sound stupid when they say they want to grow up, but i seriously do. i'm pathetic. right now i have no friends. and school starts in six days. is it bad to have a countdown on your vanity mirror? well if it is, i apologize. i want school to start soooo badly. and i want my dance classes to start so badly, as well. "The Nice Way to be Mean" was a fail as well. Kudos for rhyming? I want to end something, successfully. And i want to begin something surprisingly. all i do is want these days. It's annoying to myself, but it's true. I want my cat. my friends. i want kansas back. i want all these new people to go away. i want to stop feeling sorry for myself. i want to finish my stupid song on the piano perfectly, for once. i want to follow through on my high school plan, even though it's not much of a plan.

i'm deleting my facebnook on the 14th of august. i figured with school and all it would be too much of a distraction. i might stop writing, too. unless it's a class or something. august 14th. 25 days to go. yaaaaaaaaay.

JEEEEZE.

Okay, so i haven't blogged in forever! Oh well. I really don't care about this anymore. I guess i'll just say the most important things that happened so far. My hair is faded. Badly. Annnd I went to my gramma's house. YAAAAAAAAAAY! Peace.

PURPLE

YAYAYAYAYAY! So it was monday that I first dyed my hair. It was just my bangs. You really couldn't even tell I put it in. Then the next day we went out to eat and we were talking about getting bleach for the purple to stand out even better. So we went to Wal-Martfor bleach. There was none. Out of alllll the things Wal-Mart DOES have, it didn't have hair bleach. Really? Anyways, then we went back home- I was highly dissapointed- and Jordan and I really wanted to do it that night. So we went out to Target to see if they had some. Well luckily there was a Sally's Beauty Supply store right next door. So instead we went into Sally's. We were extremely lucky that we got there on time. They closed at 9:00 p.m. We got there at 8:55 p.m. So we went in and we got more purple dye. Then we looked for bleach. We found it, but we didn't know what to mix it with. We asked the lady what we had to mix it with, and it was litterally two feet away from the powder stuff. So we found all the stuff we needed, checked out, and as soon as we got home- dyed the bottom layer of Jordan's hair. Purple. I don't know if I said that wrong; I dyed Jordan's hair. And I looked pretty amazing while I was doing so. I had on those black gloves that people that do peircings wear. It was funny. Then after the dye was "frothy" she switched positions and started bleaching my hair. Honestly we only left it in for 15 minutes. But that was enough. When I washed my hair out in the shower, the feeling of my hair was a lot different than I thought it would be. It felt like a a lot of conditioner pouring out of my hair. It felt amazing! Jordan said when she bleached her sister's hair it felt like straw. Mine felt like a newly cut hair dew! Anywaaaays, after that we started dying it purple. The instructions say not to get in on the scapl... We should've done that. After I washed the dye out and dried it, it was close to 1:00 a.m. So I went to bed. Anna and Caitlin were over. We ended up falling asleep to the Phantom of the Opera. I really like that movie. It's pretty cool. Then in the morning I straightened my hair and I also realized that the purple didn't go EVERYWHERE in my hair. So since we still have dye left over we dyed my hair purple a second time, this time leaving out the bangs, and just doing the back. Then I left it in for 30 minutes. Then we rinsed and we realized the bangs still had a little light blond in them. Oh well! We couldn't do anything about it, so I now have to get use to it. I love the purple though. My whoooole head it Manic Panic's Ultra Violet. & I lovelovelove it.

Apologies and Philosophies.

Soooo, I did it again! Oh well. I think that's how it's going to go now. Every other day I'll post a new bloggity. Anyways, last night was fun. I went over to Anna's and I brought over my purple Manic Panic hair dye. We didn't want to go overboard, so we simply dyed to under part of my bangs and my side bangs. You really can't tell I even have it in there because of the bangs on top are so thick. Tomorrow, however, I'll be dying alllllll of it purple. I hope it looks awesome. I really like the bangs, and when I put it up in one of those Snookie poof things, you can really tell it's in there :D <----- That's the first smiley face I've done in all y blogging days so far. It's been killing me! I've done a lot of things for a first today. I dyed my bangs, did a smiley face, and right now I'm drinking Dr. Pepper which is my first soda iiiiiiin.... Almost a month. I love drinking water that's why it's been so long. I haven't been saying "I love you" to anyone lately. My sister got mad at me for it. She thinks I don't love her because I never tell it to her. I just don't like saying the phrase. Up until three months ago, I didn't even believe in love. When I told my mom she thought I was atheist or something because God is Love. I understand that, but I dunno. I just thought that this society uses that word to the greatest extent in which the phrase, "I love you", doesn't even matter anymore. It's like love just didn't exist. Then I thought it over... I kind of sounded really stupid when I told it to myself. I came up with a new philosophy when I came to my senses. It's not that love doesn't exist, it's just that it will never last forever. And I really do believe that.

Oh My Goodness

So I haven't blogged in two days. The past two days were crazy, but they were probably the best days this summer. So on the 2nd my friends, Anna and Caitlin, came back from New Mexico. They invited about ten people over to their house. They're sisters, by the way. They have a pool, so of course we had to swim. Then we fixed our hair, did our make up, and then took pictures. I hung out mostly with this girl named Morgan. She's really cool. I love how awkward moments bring people together. That's pretty much how Morgan and I started talking. We were in the pool and we were kind of the two loners because we both didn't know anyone there. I knew Whitney and Aimee, but they weren't hanging out with me. So we started talking about volleyball and polyvore and all this other stuff. It was cool. After we went inside and we did our hair, we started taking pictures. We talked about everything pretty much. Whitney had extensions. Those were fun to play with. Anna put them in her hair; they were black, Anna's hair is blond. It didn't look really good. It was actually kind of odd looking. Then we took more pictures and eventually went into the living room. The whole couch was taken up. And that means a lot because Anna's couch is huuuuge. I hate sleeping on floors, and the ottoman was pretty big, so I laid down on that. We watched three movies and before we knew it, it was 7:40 in the morning and pretty much everyone was still awake. Except for three people. Anyways, then the phone rang and it was my step mom. Caitlin answered it. Mary wanted Lauran and me to come home to watch our dogs. Normally that wasn't a problem, but my dog Taz got hot spots and we had to make sure he didn't chew himself even more. When we were walking home I told myself I shouldn't even go to bed, but when I walked in to the door it was freezing cold. When it's cold it almost multiplies my sleepiness. My bed was nice and cold; I loved it. I went to bed right away, and slept til 2:15. Then my brother woke me up and told me he was going to Georgia Perimeter Mall. It sounded cool, so I got up, took a shower, and left for the mall with Nathan at 3:00 I think. We ended up hitting traffic and got there at 4:30. The reason we were going there was for Nathan's Apple Store appointment, his iPhone broke or something. We walked around for a while and got lost in Macy's and also pretzel sticks and strawberry lemonade. It was good. We also went into Lush. After Nathan's appointment, which took an hour, we went back to Lush and bought bath bombs for Jordan. They were cool. When you dip them in water and then take them out, it looks like acid. It's awesome. So yeah. That's why I didn't have time to blog. Oh yeah, we also went to Chick-fil-a on our way home. It was delicious. As always.

GAAAAAAAAAH

So yesterday I didn't blog. I kinda felt incomplete, but I really didn't have any time to. And when I did, I forgot to get on here. Oh well. So yesterday was boring and then fun. We went out, My dad, step mom, sister, and I and we first went to Wal-Mart to get a picture for this lady that my step mom works with. Then we went to Michael's and we got frames and such. When we were there though, I found the most amazing piece of work. It was a movie clip of Breakfast at Tiffany's. You probably don't know this, but Audrey Hepburn is my favorite actor in the entiiiiiiire world. I'm serious. I love her! The picture was of her when she was staring into at the chandeliers, eating her breakfast. IT WAS GORGEOUS. It was 25x42 or something along those lines and I wanted it sooooooo bad, but I couldn't get it that day. Oh well. Right when we were leaving Michael's it started to rain. It wasn't that bad until we got into the truck, and went over to Target (Mary needed nicotine gum). Since nobody wanted to get out, my dad went out, and got the gum alone. After he left, the wind started up as well. There were about eight Target carts right beside our truck, and they were coming closer and closer. So Mary, being the loving wife that she is, got out and started corralling the carts. She was only one person though, so I got out and helped her, too. As soon as I was out there my Vans were drenched, my hair was soaked, and I officially was unofficially working for Target. I felt proud. Until I got into the truck and it was near freezing because ,up until ten minutes prior, it was 95 degrees outside, so of course we had our A/C on full blast. Then dad got back in the car and we were on our way to Chick-fil-a. Lemme' tell ya, I lovelovelove Chick-fil-a. Their chocolate milkshakes are my favorite thing in the world. I just realized I say that a lot. Oh well, anyways since we were absolutely saturated we decided to go through the drive threw. That was... A fail. They had a hood over the speaker, but the wind was blowing so hard it simply blew the rain right into my dad's face. After he rolled down the window for five seconds, he got frustrated and pulled around, and drove into a parking slot. Then we all told him what we wanted and he went inside to order. I ordered a char grilled club sandwich, JUST the sandwich. I didn't get fries or a drink so I could purposely get a milk shake, when I asked for one Mary said no. I didn't feel like arguing so I just said okay and forgot about it. When my dad got back in with the drinks and such, Mary realized I didn't get anything to drink. She said, "Oh, you didn't get anything?" and I said, "No, all I wanted was a milkshake to drink." and then she felt bad, I can't tell you if that made me feel good or great, but it was definately one of those. Then my dad, being the great dad he is, pulled into the drive threw window part of Chick-fil-a and we waited 15 minutes for a small chocolate milkshake and Mary got a refil of Dr. Pepper. I was happy. My family was happy. And when I opened the box to my sandwich, it looked like an advertisement sandwich. It was delicious. So then we went home and I changed clothes, laid in bed, and eventually fell asleep after watching three movies. In other words: It was a fun day.

Shocking!

So today went by surprisingly. Last night was... Good, I guess. The chicken Jordan made was awfully dry. I don't think it was her fault at all. I, personally, hate chicken that isn't grilled or breaded. This chicken was cooked in a pan.... So to me, it was ovened. I guess I don't like ovened chicken. Anyways, today was an off day for me. I didn't take a shower till 4:00 p.m. because I had to wash basically all of my clothes. I hate my shower. It spews out water at you from it's spout as if it didn't know how to spew. WHAT SHOWER SPOUT DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO SPEW WATER AT YOU CORRECTLY?! It's extremely annoying. My dad's shower is perfect. I try taking as much showers in his bathroom as possible. I can't take a shower in his bathroom until my step mom gets more of her clay conditioner. I lovelovelove that stuff! It's from Aveda. I think that's how you spell it. Oh well. Anyways, it makes my hair feel incredibly soft and it smells soooo good. I wouldn't eat it though... I don't think that would taste good at all. So today I wasn't supposed to text ANYONE. That was a failure. I texted at 12:07 at night. And again at 9:45 in the morning. I can't just NOT text someone after they text me. Especially if the person that texts me is one of my best friends. So, no. I'm not even going to try that, anymore. Today Lauran and I went to Wal-Mart and were specifically told to buy scooby snacks. Scooby snacks to my family are basically oatmeal cream pies, star crunch, annnnd rice crispy treats. DELICIOUS. Plus we got 10 of these long things of little candy bars. Each case of them were a dollar. It came out to $19 and some cents. Right when we got into the truck I opened up the oatmeal creme pies and ate one. I love those. Another one of my loves are Burger King's chocolate pies. MMMMMMMM. They're to die for. I had one a few weeks ago. They're probably the only things in the world that won't ever change in flavor. EVER. If they do I think I'll die. Or maybe just wail on the floor for 6345357356 hours. Either way. I really don't have much to say. I have no idea why I gave this post a title of Shocking! I guess the shock is an after shock of some sort. Let's hope so.

Hey You.

Okay, so today was fun. Last night was awful. My allergies acted up to the point that I was basically crying. My brother did an 20+ Blessing on me. Which means that he blessed me for the next 20 times I sneezed. That didn't last long at all. Jordan's spaghetti squash was actually really good. It still had the same feeling as noodles that I hate, but other then that it was fantastic! She also made these rasberry bars. I think they're my favorite kind of food in the entire wolrd. I would show you by taking a picture, but we don't have anymore. Tonight is Jordan's last day with us until she comes back on either July 4th or the 5th. She's making strawberry short cake tonight. I thought those were pretty good, too. Today Jordan wanted to take Nathan lunch. She asked me to go with her aaaaaaaat 1:45 ? At the least. Nathan's break wasn't until 2:30. She thought it would be okay. We ended up hanging out at the Dollar Tree right beside Message Envy. We bought two coloring books, crayons, and Flips. Flips are chocolate covered pretzels if you didn't know that. They were really good besides the fact they were basically melting in my fingers. Other than that, PERFECTION. Soooooo, my cat Stripes is extremly over weight. He's like 50 lbs, but he's so cute! I made him a myspace a long time ago. Nobody added him though... Awkward. I love saying that word now. My and my friend Lili say it allllll the time. I'm trying not to text for a whole day. That day will be tomorrow. The longest i've gone without texting was 18 hours i do believe. It wasn't that bad.... Until I see someone else texting, or there's an awkward moment and I need my phone to make the moment less awkward. Otherwise I really don't need my phone that much. Anywho, I have no idea how to promote my blog. I want people to read it, but not anyone I actually know. Afterall, this is basically my diary where I vent. If there is someone actually reading my blog; Hi. "The summer plan" part of this will be coming on the 1st of July. Hopefully you'll still be reading by then.

Afterwards.

So when I left off, Marcus got a girl friend. It took me almost five months to realize he was never going to date me. Seriously. I was pretty much "heart broken", I guess you could say. I didn't love him though. Love, to me, is when two people have such extreme feelings for each other, they can't just say 'I really like you' anymore. Instead, they have to put a label on it. Which is love. I don't think i've ever loved anyone before. I think Marcus was the closest thing to it, but it still was not love. Anywho, enough about him. Let's see.... Today we went to Publix. Jordan knows how to cook spaghetti squash. We'll see how that one turns out. Two days ago, we tie-dyed. That was thrilling, in a way. I didn't wear gloves, so now my finger nails are dyed purple, yellow, and..... Fuchsia? Yes, fuchsia. The shirts came out looking amazing. I was pretty happy about it. We got white tank tops from Wal-Mart. Jordan asked me what size I needed. I told her medium. She looked at me and was said, "You can't possibly be medium. I'm a small." It took me about five minutes to convince her that I needed a medium. I thought it was pretty clear. I've weighed the same weight for almost a year now. I guess it's good, but I don't like the weight i'm at right now. I weight 130-135 lbs. I guess it's not bad, but my sister Jasmine, 17 (she lives with my mom and brother), weighs the same as me. And i'm younger than her. So I don't really know. I've gotten down to one meal a day when I have gum. It kills Jordan that my family skips breakfast, and lunch almost everyday. She has to eat all three meals, or she gets grumpy. We had chick-fil-a today for lunch. It was really good. I love their milk shakes. Jordan licked her finger and put it on Nathan's chicken finger. When he ate it, she started crying because it was so funny to her. When Nathan found out, he really wasn't that amused. Lauran and I could only laugh. I guess I was really only laughing because Jordan thought it was so funny. I didn't think the actual thing she did was funny, but she was seriously crying because of it. It was, as my good friend Lillian says, HILAR. I hate that word. Lily loves it. Since my friends in Georgia aren't here till the first of July, i'm constantly texting my friends from Kansas and Virginia. I wish I could go back to Kansas. I love spending time with my dad here, but honestly he's never home. And when he is the Braves are on. YAY. Oh well. I'm going to Colorado on August 3rd I think for volleyball tryouts. I haven't done one bit of conditioning since I got here. If i don't make one of the four teams there, it's because I died because my heart stopped beating. If luck exists, it should enlighten me right about now.

Background Check.

Hello. My name is Riki. 1st time blogger, I guess you could say. This summer i'm at my dad's house, as always. My dad's house now consists of six people. My dad, my step-mom, Mary Jane, my sister, Lauran, my brother, Nathan, and his girl friend, Jordan. And Me. Everyone's older than me. My sister is 21, going on 22. My brother, 25, as well as his girl friend. So far this summer I have done nothing. We live in Georgia, 45 minutes away from Six Flags and 15 minutes away from Atlanta. So I decided to make a plan for the summer. Jordan hates being locked inside the house all the time. She normally lives in Virginia, but she came down here to visit Nathan. Nathan, however, has enrolled in college to get his nursing degree, and also has a job at Message Envy. He's a licened Message Therapist. He went to Atlanta's School of Message, simply to find out nobody really needs a message therapist anymore, but basically- he's never home. I now hate this house of mine. Living with five cats and two highly annoying, yet equally adorable dogs; with allergies isn't my cup of tea. I've been spending a lot of time on the computer. Texting is like a third language to me now. I try not text at all, but the feeling of my phone vibrating is kind of like a reminder that not all of my friends in Kansas has forgotten me yet. I lived in Kansas for a year with my mom at Fort Leavenworth. Honestly, we didn't really even live in Kansas. Fort Leavenworth is right on the border of KS and MO. The people there were all right, some were terrible, but others were splendid. I made my first best friend there! I was soooo happy, and the best part was that she called me her best friend, too. Her name was Rachael. She was awesome. Her boyfriend was Maverick. He was one of my best friends, too. The three of us all had the first two periods together. (Art being 1st period and Tech Lab being 2nd.) That school year was the best school year of my life. Only two times were there major drama. Note to self: Don't make a fake lip ring, flaunt it around school, and then get into a fight with the girl you THOUGHT was your best friend and was the only girl that knew it was fake. Three weeks was all it took for that bent bobby pin to start making an actual hole in my lip. I knew I had to take it out. When I was a baby, my mom got my ears peirced. My ears got infected; boils started growing on them, he said. I didn't want that to happen to my lip. So then almost a month after i took it out, this girl, Ashley, decided, since I 'sided with her ex-boyfriend', she would bring five other people into our disagreement and tell them all that I cussed her out and made fun of her present boyfriend, Chris. Let me tell you something about this daaarling 16 year-old boy named Chris. First off, he failed freshman year. Twice. Secondly, he brought a gun to school last year I do believe, and he claims he had no idea how it got into his bookbag. Really? Thirdly, can I say thirdly? I don't know, but anywho- Thirdly, he claims he's going to commit suicide every single time one of his girlfriends want to break up with him. FANTASTIC, right? I'm still waiting. I think the best story out of this relationship, is the beggining. She was dating a guy named Matt. Matt and her were perfect for each other. Matt didn't come with any drama. Ashley needs drama, though. Her goal in life is to recieve the most attention however she possibly can. So she knew she had to break up with Matt, she liked Chris by then, so she told Matt, "My dad found out about us and he doesn't want us going out." So then, Matt's heart crushed, she goes out with Chris. Three days later. FANTASTIC, right? Anyways, then I started liking one of Ashley's ex-boyfriends; Marcus. I liked Marcus since the first time I ever saw him. That was in...... August of 2009? We hung out about five times. Halloween, however, Ashley and Marcus HELD HANDS!!!!!! in Ashley's candy bag. She was still going out with Matt. So she claims at the VERY moment, she had to stop talking to Marcus from then on. Why? Because they held hands. Woop-dee-doo. So anyways, then I started talking to him before Christmas break. We talked for forever sometimes. Once til 3:30 a.m. Then I fell asleep on him, oh well. The only person that I could talk to him about, was Ashley. I told her everything. I didn't even think about it. Oh, and something I forgot to say, Marcus had a girl friend at the time. Annnnnnnnnnnnd he might've asked if I would ever concider cheating with him. I told Ashley that, too. She didn't like that. She didn't like ANY of it. So I had to choose which one I would rather have, Marcus. Or Ashley. I made the worst mistake of my life. I chose Ashley. BOOOOOOOOO. I lied to Marcus. I told him I was grounded for three months and I couldn't text. I hated myself. For a long time. And then when I finally came to senses, I texted Marcus a month later. He had a girl friend. YAY.