Nothing's better.

So in my last post i said when school starts everything will be better. it kind of has. but not really. i've only made three friends. but it's only been a week. the girls at my school are extremely uninteresting and set in the cliques to an extent that if you laugh at what they're saying, and you're not in their clique they'll look at you like you did something wrong. all my friends are the new kids. the clique girls are the classical prep type with a rich dad and straight hair, pinned back. there's like one original one amongst them all, but she's kind of rude. she asks me things like "Are those really butterflies?" or "Does your bracelet really say rape?" I mean how do you respond to that? "No, those are colorful puppies on my notebook, not butterflies." "Rape?! WHAT?! NO!" No. Of course i had to say yeah and she acted like she was higher than me by snickering to herself and then widening her eyes about the rape bracelet. All my old friends rarely talk to me. I hardly ever have to charge my phone, but i still do just to do it. so far Lily has forgetten about me. but that's all. so i guess it's not that bad. even though she was one of my best friends. I think i'll write more on The Nice Way to be Mean.I feel a little down. and that's when the most drama comes out of me :D

Well.

This blog was a fail. Polyvore got the best of me. So has facebook and myspace. and my stupid phone. i apologize blogger. i never started a summer plan. and i think that's why my summer went by so quickly. i plan things. a lot of things. i already know what i'm doing when i'm older. the college i'm going to. even the classes i'm taking next semester. and i love that. it's just getting there that i hate. i know kids sound stupid when they say they want to grow up, but i seriously do. i'm pathetic. right now i have no friends. and school starts in six days. is it bad to have a countdown on your vanity mirror? well if it is, i apologize. i want school to start soooo badly. and i want my dance classes to start so badly, as well. "The Nice Way to be Mean" was a fail as well. Kudos for rhyming? I want to end something, successfully. And i want to begin something surprisingly. all i do is want these days. It's annoying to myself, but it's true. I want my cat. my friends. i want kansas back. i want all these new people to go away. i want to stop feeling sorry for myself. i want to finish my stupid song on the piano perfectly, for once. i want to follow through on my high school plan, even though it's not much of a plan.